Hello! I hope all of you members are enjoying the
latest "superheroine" update with me at the mercy of
Shelly the Burbank Bomber. The photos were taken
during a recent custom video shoot that I did. If you
wish to see more of Shelly, she can be found at
www.burbankbomber.com. She is even available for
one-on-one wrestling matches, and she is STRONG and
TOUGH. Believe me. I'm not kidding. I wrote all about
the shoot on the members' bulletin board so be sure to
check that out. Maybe I'll start working on my
wrestling moves in case Shelly and I meet again....
Just kidding- that would require far too much effort
and discipline on my part. Besides, I could train for
the next few years and she would still kick my butt.
In addition to her take-no-prisoners athleticism,
Shelly is a very nice person and was a blast to work
with. Even when she forced me to suck on her strap-on
dildo and poured burning-hot candle wax on me.

Last week I wrote that I was on the cover of the June
Leg World, but I'm not. (Should have checked before I
said that!)I do, however, have a photo layout and
interview in that issue. I'm also in some photos in
the Spring 2003 issue of Gene Simmon's Tongue
Magazine. It's an article about Jeanne "Hollywood"
Basone and her wrestling company www.webkitten.com.
I'm actually going to be working for her again next
week. Like Shelly, Jeanne also does one-on-one
wrestling matches. So if you want to wrestle a
former Playboy model, or want to watch her wrestle,
Jeanne can be reached through her website. There are
some photos of her and me in a catfight in my members'
area as well.
Also this month I'm in the German GQ STYLE. I haven't
seen it, but I'm in a photo spread with well-known
male model Tony Ward and Sin City contract girl
Karina. It's one of only two magazine shoots I have
ever done with a male model. I think that issue may
only be available in Europe.

This weekend I am going to an "artwalk" at an
artists' colony in downtown LA. Although I enjoy
looking at various types of art, I am still very much
of a philistine. I'm not saying that with pride
either. I've viewed many works by highly acclaimed
artists, and have often found that I don't see why
they have received so many accolades. Please don't
think that I am criticizing their creativity or effort
because I'm not. Perhaps there is something missing
within me or maybe I am simply not educated enough to
appreciate what makes their work special. I'm not
really sure.
Before I dropped out of college the first time I was
a history/art history major at UCLA. I have always
found art history very interesting. A great deal is
revealed about any culture through the artwork that it
produces. From a historical perspective it is
fascinating. At some point in my studies I took what
was basically the equivalent of an art appreciation
course. Everyone in the class had to attend a certain
gallery exhibit. One of the paintings at the exhibit
had won a "best in show" award or some such thing. It
was a canvas covered in solid, flat black. There were
no brush strokes or anything to break up the
monochrommatic blackness. It was interesting, but as I
gazed at it I couldn't help but think: "Wait, I could
have done that." For that matter, the average
5-year-old could have created it too. Of course,
something that is rendered simply can be very
compelling, but I just
couldn't see what made this work the "best in show."
Two women were standing near me in the gallery and
commenting on the painting. They spoke of it in
glowing terms. I can't quite remember what they were
saying, but it struck me as very pretentious and
stupid at the time. It seemed to me that they wanted
to praise it because someone else had called it
exemplary. Then again, maybe they just had a great
deal more insight than I. I'm not being sarcastic, I
just really don't know.
A few years ago I saw a segment of Howard Stern's TV
show. He was laughing at one of his people,
(Robin), because she had just paid a large sum of
money for a painting by Jackson Pollock. Howard bet
her that she would not be able to distinguish one of
his own
self-created masterpieces from four of Jackson
Pollock's works if he placed them all next to each
other. During the show Howard was seen throwing
various colors of paint on a canvas and laughing. I
think he used his fingers and a paintbrush to create
some shapes and squiggles with the paint. It took
about 10 minutes for him to finish. At the end
of the show Robin could not identify which one
of the five paintings Howard had created. That was
after she had already paid a lot of lip service to the
unique power of Pollock's work.
That show was hilarious not because it mocked
Pollock's creativity, but because it made a really
good point. Appreciation of art is extremely
subjective. Not everybody likes the same stuff.
Amusingly though, many people will collect certain
pieces simply because someone else told them that
those pieces had artistic merit. I've always been of
the mindset that art is whatever inspires you
personally. If four dogs playing poker has meaning for
you, then you should hang one of those pictures on
your wall. Same with the Velvet Elvises.
Speaking of Velvet Elvises, there was a great article in the Los Angeles Times about the whole genre by Annie Groer. It was published last August, but you can still find it at www.latimes.com if you do a search in their archives. Type in "velvet Elvis." In the article the director of the Walters Art Museum in Baltimore, MD discusses the "baroque pathos" of the velvet Elvis renderings. This same gentleman used to teach a course at Johns Hopkins University called "Holy through the Ages. Early Christian Saints through Elvis." He compares some of the velvet Elvises to Caravaggio's 16th and 17th century paintings of saints. The article is very funny and well worth reading. It also delighted me beyond reason. I never thought my artistic tastes would be validated by a professor at Johns Hopkins.
I don't actually own any velvet Elvises, but I do feel some strange kinship with anyone who would hang a velvet Elvis on his wall. I know what it is to derive great pleasure from something that most of the world scorns.
The art walk tomorrow should be interesting. Maybe it will broaden my horizons. Supposedly the event attracts a huge number of people so it will also be fun to see other people's reactions to the work displayed. I hope all of you have a good weekend too!